Each man harbors an ocean within his rib cage, a colossal sea which pulls and pushes him tossing him in tornadoes. In such a whirlpool of emotions, thoughts, doubts, insecurities, confusion, loneliness, despair, love, hope and happiness one questions does man have an anchor or is his being a half shredded raft abandoned by gods ? He struggles to steer his being to a shore which he can’t even see.
Our selves have become dilapidated mansions, the long corridors in our hearts are floating in unfillable lacunae pregnant with gnawing awumbuk, our tender curtains shyly ruffle with pangs of kaukokaipuu, our ghastly mirrors ache because they couldn’t cling on to the reflections of our loved ones, light slid reflecting transient phenomenal silhouettes leaving vacant mirrors behind.
We are like little children bedazzled by the swirling psychedelic colors in a gypsy fair, our pupils hypnotized by forms, our tongues salivating for cotton candy, awestruck and aimless we perpetuate our own cyr wheels trapped in rings of desire. And when sundown comes and our pockets are empty we are haunted by the shadows of very clowns who once amused us. Struck with an unknown terror we wake from our absorbed reverie to find that we are utterly alone and the halogen circus lights are shutting one by one.
It is in such a delirious moment of existential fever that we try to find our way back home, a home which we have forgotten. We search crumpled maps drawn by children who left before us only to find that each of us have make our own paths. Dragging our dolls we run amok having only heavy breath for company.
By the grace of some cosmic motherly force combined by volcanic quest some children make the most extraordinary discovery.
They find that their eyes were covered by hallucinogenic lenses. Light split from these lens into prisms creating phantom dream realms floating in the non existent future. The very nature of these diabolical lens forced our pupils to covet that which is not. Forever unsatisfied with what is; our eyeballs shifted in hollow dreams chasing mist.
By the very desires we seek we miss ourselves. We are dogs chasing our own tails forever deluded under the schizophrenic slumber spell of Maya. Chasing phantom visions human consciousness is suspended in a metaphysical web of misty slumber clouded by non existent past and future. Mindfulness or being aware of the present moment is the panacea of the soul given by all spiritual masters.
Startled the children now make a greater discovery. They find when light of awareness isn’t focused on objects of desire it settles back in itself knowing itself by self illuminating radiance.
Then peace that passeth all understanding descends cooling our hellish heads, budding saplings of love and making way for expansive freedom in our choked beings.
Trailing our consciousness back to its own source we can find our way out of the nightmarish labyrinth of Samsara. Keenly contemplating the impermanence of contents of our consciousness and being cognizant of the deluding nature of desire we can be free.
I have found my own light under the loving gaze of my guru Swami Sebak Bhai. May mother Kali illuminate us all. Awake its now or never my fellow travelers.
Akash Sinha
akashswhitewolf 